A whole new world... but another never forgotten

We have been home now the same amount of time we were in the Marshall Islands. In just four weeks in America, Rickson has gone to Kings Island Amusement Park and ridden a Merry-Go-Round. He has made several trips to the Kenwood Mall. He has been to three Cincinnati Reds games, watching one from a suite. He has seen fireworks and tried on a Halloween costume. He has been to church in the air conditioning and fallen asleep in my arms as we sang praises in a language still new to him. He gets a bath every day in warm water from a sink. He smells like sweet baby lotion. Rickson has been introduced to a carseat and stroller, bouncy seats and play mats, light up toys and rattles. He has already seen a doctor three times for well-baby check-ups. He has felt a cool almost fall like breeze on his face. The experiences and opportunities will be endless.

Yet I cannot stop thinking about the world we left behind. A world Rickson will never know first hand. As the weeks turn into months, his memories will fade. My infant son will not remember what it was like to live with his birthmother and love her. He will not remember her bathing him in that day’s rainwater. He will not remember the intense heat and bugs that always surrounded him. He will not remember the lack of toys or fancy entertainment and how that didn’t matter. He will not remember his birth brothers and sisters holding him and kissing his cheeks. He will not know his birthmothers love from his own memory.

That is my job. My job to make sure that he knows about that wonderful place. That he feels all that love. He may not have his own memories, but I hope I can do my very best to create them for him. I hope the thousands of pictures I took captured some of the love in his birth mother’s eyes. That my stories will feel like his own. That maybe he will remember how it felt to be held in his birthmother’s arms. Together, this love will never be forgotten…